How many men do you need for a mafia funeral? Only one. To slam the car boot shut.

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off NOW!

Why was Phillip's girlfriend annoyed? Coz she found out that Phillips 24 inch was a TV.

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.

What is the difference between a woman and a magnet? Magnets have a positive side!

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"

If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.

All the love that history knows is said to be in every rose!Yet all the love that could be found in two, is less than what I feel for you.

We will now upgrade your brain, please wait....Searching....searching...still searching....sorry,NO BRAIN found...!